How to survive—and even enjoy—your solo flight

By Pierra Calasanz-Labrador for Yahoo! Southeast Asia

It happens to the best of us—those hollow, agonizing bouts of loneliness. One moment we can be partying in a crowd, and the next, feeling like no one in the world "gets" us.
It can happen when we're fresh from a heartbreak, or maybe still yearning for that first love. It can happen when we're not successful enough; and yet, when we've become too successful, it's lonelier still, because we no longer know whom to trust.
Hundreds of Facebook friends, thousands of Twitter followers, yet none to call when you're feeling down. As they say, it's lonely at the top. It's lonely at the bottom, too, and all the places in between. How do we shake off this solitary feeling?


Find your tribe
We all want to be loved for ourselves, but have you ever pretended to be what you're not, just to fit in? That's where the problem begins. We try so hard to gain acceptance, and when we fail—as the black sheep of the family, as the girl from the wrong side of the tracks, or with an unrequited love—the loneliness sets in.
If you always feel like you're on the outside looking in, perhaps you're looking in all the wrong places. There's nothing worse than constantly trying to readjust your personality to get a guy to like you or gain acceptance into the "in" crowd. What's wrong with the real you?
Gravitate towards people who share the same interests, ideals, or even the same sense of humor. Join clubs, workshops or classes; and if you don't know anyone who shares the same passions, you can always count on online forums. Spend more time with people who like you for you, and help you grow—you may find that instead of one tight circle, moving in different crowds to nurture different sides of yourself might work best. Bottomline, look for people who fit you, and not the other way around.

Alone, but not lonely
Okay, so Prince Charming hasn't arrived at your doorstep yet. It doesn't mean you should put your life on hold till he makes his appearance. As meltingly romantic as that Jerry Maguire line was, you don't need anyone to tell you "You complete me" to feel whole.
It's important to nurture your sense of self. Shift your perspective and learn that you make your own happiness—a significant other doesn't have to bring it to you on a silver platter.
Being alone is not such a bad thing; in fact, solitude can be quite cathartic, helping you to reconnect with yourself and stay true to your course. Revel in your freedom, relish your "me time" and aim to be the best version of yourself. This way, you gain a precious sense of self-worth, and you'll never settle for less than you deserve.

Facebook Generation
Connecting is easier—but oftentimes, more impersonal—in the digital age.
If you're social networking addiction is making you feel even lonelier, miserable (how did it turn into a show of one-upmanship?), or more disconnected from real life than ever before, then it's time to gain back control. Weed out the bad vibes and trim that contact list to people you really care about interacting with. Then, make a conscious effort to actually keep in touch.
You may be whining in your head about how your friends never bother to contact you anymore, but they might just be thinking the same thing about you. And when you do hang out, give your friends your full attention. If they're as addicted to their phones as you are, make a pact to keep your mobile devices out of sight. Have you heard of the game where everyone puts their mobile phone in a stack when eating out? The first person who reaches for their phone before the meal ends has to treat everyone else. Genius!
Social networking is great for connecting with friends old and new, far and wide—but remember, when those friends are right in front of you, concentrate on truly enjoying their company and maintaining meaningful relationships offline.

Support system

Friends grow distant. Lovers lose that spark. Family members grow up and move away. There will always be events in our lives that threaten us with a sense of abandonment. There may be days when we are struck with the anguish of loneliness, like no one understands what we're going through, and even our closest friends can't relate. But sometimes, we don't give people enough credit.
Perhaps they might be able to relate after all, and help us through our pain, if we just allow ourselves to open up and be vulnerable. There's no need to pretend to be strong when among true friends. And don't forget, being Filipino usually means having a built-in support system, AKA, a whole extended family that looks out for each other.

Much of our loneliness stems from feelings of inadequacy. We all experience it, some more intensely than others, but it's important catch yourself before you wallow in misery. Every time you feel like you could disappear off of the face of the earth and no one would notice, fight off your insecurities and know that you matter in the world. Make yourself matter! When you've skipped the pity party, you'll find that there are people who truly care about you—it just may not always be apparent in the hustle and bustle of everyday life.

Color Psychology At Work

Colors are believed to have an effect on our psychology; try wearing these shades in different work situations and see if it helps. Adapted from Juliet Soh, JobsCentral

There is a reason why there are so many idioms that describe moods with colors: having the blues, seeing red, tickled pink and green with envy. That’s because colors indeed have powerful effects on our psychology. In fact, the Egyptians and Chinese have been practicing “chromotherapy”, an alternative treatment using colors to heal, for thousands of years. Now, tap on the knowledge of color psychology and find out if it works for you.

1. There is a reason why there are so many idioms that describe moods with colors: having the blues, seeing red, tickled pink and green with envy. That’s because colors indeed have powerful effects on our psychology. In fact, the Egyptians and Chinese have been practicing “chromotherapy”, an alternative treatment using colors to heal, for thousands of years. Now, tap on the knowledge of color psychology and find out if it works for you.

   There is a reason why there are so many idioms that describe moods with colors: having the blues, seeing red, tickled pink and green with envy. That’s because colors indeed have powerful effects on our psychology. In fact, the Egyptians and Chinese have been practicing “chromotherapy”, an alternative treatment using colors to heal, for thousands of years. Now, tap on the knowledge of color psychology and find out if it works for you.
2. Blue: The calming color
   The color of the ocean and sky, blue is synonymous with peace and composure. This color has a relaxing and calming effect on people.
   Wear it when: You are meeting a disgruntled customer or an angered boss to do some damage control. Seeing shades of blue on you can make him/her feel less stressed and lower inclination to aggression. This (fingers crossed!) should make appeasing him/her much easier.

   Blue: The calming color
   The color of the ocean and sky, blue is synonymous with peace and composure. This color has a relaxing and calming effect on people.
   Wear it when: You are meeting a disgruntled customer or an angered boss to do some damage control. Seeing shades of blue on you can make him/her feel less stressed and lower inclination to aggression. This (fingers crossed!) should make appeasing him/her much easier.
3. Black: The shade of authority
   Black is a somber color that oozes responsibility, power and authority. That’s probably the differentiating factor that makes Batman’s getup look less hilarious than Superman’s.
   Wear it when: You are chairing an important meeting. To ensure that every attendee—even those more senior than you are—take you seriously, wearing black can make them feel that you mean business. You could also include black in your work getup if you want your boss to start noticing you as a potential candidate to promote to a managerial position.
4. Orange: The energetic hue
   Just like red, orange is an attention-grabbing color, but is more soothing on the eyes. Orange helps channel energy and can put people instantly in a chirpy and positive mood.
   Wear it when: You need to encourage your team mates. During a particularly demoralizing period when everyone in the office is feeling moody from setbacks or crazy deadlines, include orange in your outfit when you address them so the optimistic spirit can rub off on them too. 
5. Purple: The tint of intuition
   Purple is often associated with luxury and sophistication. At the same time, this color is a stimulating shade that’s said to get you in tune with your spiritual and intuitive side.
   Wear it when: You need to make a tough decision and are going nowhere. Standing at a career crossroad? Or need to make a difficult judgment? Put on your thinking cap—preferably in purple—to help you reach a conclusion you’d be at peace with.(This Article is courtesy of Yahoo She philippines)