How to survive—and even enjoy—your solo flight

By Pierra Calasanz-Labrador for Yahoo! Southeast Asia

It happens to the best of us—those hollow, agonizing bouts of loneliness. One moment we can be partying in a crowd, and the next, feeling like no one in the world "gets" us.
It can happen when we're fresh from a heartbreak, or maybe still yearning for that first love. It can happen when we're not successful enough; and yet, when we've become too successful, it's lonelier still, because we no longer know whom to trust.
Hundreds of Facebook friends, thousands of Twitter followers, yet none to call when you're feeling down. As they say, it's lonely at the top. It's lonely at the bottom, too, and all the places in between. How do we shake off this solitary feeling?


Find your tribe
We all want to be loved for ourselves, but have you ever pretended to be what you're not, just to fit in? That's where the problem begins. We try so hard to gain acceptance, and when we fail—as the black sheep of the family, as the girl from the wrong side of the tracks, or with an unrequited love—the loneliness sets in.
If you always feel like you're on the outside looking in, perhaps you're looking in all the wrong places. There's nothing worse than constantly trying to readjust your personality to get a guy to like you or gain acceptance into the "in" crowd. What's wrong with the real you?
Gravitate towards people who share the same interests, ideals, or even the same sense of humor. Join clubs, workshops or classes; and if you don't know anyone who shares the same passions, you can always count on online forums. Spend more time with people who like you for you, and help you grow—you may find that instead of one tight circle, moving in different crowds to nurture different sides of yourself might work best. Bottomline, look for people who fit you, and not the other way around.

Alone, but not lonely
Okay, so Prince Charming hasn't arrived at your doorstep yet. It doesn't mean you should put your life on hold till he makes his appearance. As meltingly romantic as that Jerry Maguire line was, you don't need anyone to tell you "You complete me" to feel whole.
It's important to nurture your sense of self. Shift your perspective and learn that you make your own happiness—a significant other doesn't have to bring it to you on a silver platter.
Being alone is not such a bad thing; in fact, solitude can be quite cathartic, helping you to reconnect with yourself and stay true to your course. Revel in your freedom, relish your "me time" and aim to be the best version of yourself. This way, you gain a precious sense of self-worth, and you'll never settle for less than you deserve.

Facebook Generation
Connecting is easier—but oftentimes, more impersonal—in the digital age.
If you're social networking addiction is making you feel even lonelier, miserable (how did it turn into a show of one-upmanship?), or more disconnected from real life than ever before, then it's time to gain back control. Weed out the bad vibes and trim that contact list to people you really care about interacting with. Then, make a conscious effort to actually keep in touch.
You may be whining in your head about how your friends never bother to contact you anymore, but they might just be thinking the same thing about you. And when you do hang out, give your friends your full attention. If they're as addicted to their phones as you are, make a pact to keep your mobile devices out of sight. Have you heard of the game where everyone puts their mobile phone in a stack when eating out? The first person who reaches for their phone before the meal ends has to treat everyone else. Genius!
Social networking is great for connecting with friends old and new, far and wide—but remember, when those friends are right in front of you, concentrate on truly enjoying their company and maintaining meaningful relationships offline.

Support system

Friends grow distant. Lovers lose that spark. Family members grow up and move away. There will always be events in our lives that threaten us with a sense of abandonment. There may be days when we are struck with the anguish of loneliness, like no one understands what we're going through, and even our closest friends can't relate. But sometimes, we don't give people enough credit.
Perhaps they might be able to relate after all, and help us through our pain, if we just allow ourselves to open up and be vulnerable. There's no need to pretend to be strong when among true friends. And don't forget, being Filipino usually means having a built-in support system, AKA, a whole extended family that looks out for each other.

Much of our loneliness stems from feelings of inadequacy. We all experience it, some more intensely than others, but it's important catch yourself before you wallow in misery. Every time you feel like you could disappear off of the face of the earth and no one would notice, fight off your insecurities and know that you matter in the world. Make yourself matter! When you've skipped the pity party, you'll find that there are people who truly care about you—it just may not always be apparent in the hustle and bustle of everyday life.

Color Psychology At Work

Colors are believed to have an effect on our psychology; try wearing these shades in different work situations and see if it helps. Adapted from Juliet Soh, JobsCentral

There is a reason why there are so many idioms that describe moods with colors: having the blues, seeing red, tickled pink and green with envy. That’s because colors indeed have powerful effects on our psychology. In fact, the Egyptians and Chinese have been practicing “chromotherapy”, an alternative treatment using colors to heal, for thousands of years. Now, tap on the knowledge of color psychology and find out if it works for you.

1. There is a reason why there are so many idioms that describe moods with colors: having the blues, seeing red, tickled pink and green with envy. That’s because colors indeed have powerful effects on our psychology. In fact, the Egyptians and Chinese have been practicing “chromotherapy”, an alternative treatment using colors to heal, for thousands of years. Now, tap on the knowledge of color psychology and find out if it works for you.

   There is a reason why there are so many idioms that describe moods with colors: having the blues, seeing red, tickled pink and green with envy. That’s because colors indeed have powerful effects on our psychology. In fact, the Egyptians and Chinese have been practicing “chromotherapy”, an alternative treatment using colors to heal, for thousands of years. Now, tap on the knowledge of color psychology and find out if it works for you.
2. Blue: The calming color
   The color of the ocean and sky, blue is synonymous with peace and composure. This color has a relaxing and calming effect on people.
   Wear it when: You are meeting a disgruntled customer or an angered boss to do some damage control. Seeing shades of blue on you can make him/her feel less stressed and lower inclination to aggression. This (fingers crossed!) should make appeasing him/her much easier.

   Blue: The calming color
   The color of the ocean and sky, blue is synonymous with peace and composure. This color has a relaxing and calming effect on people.
   Wear it when: You are meeting a disgruntled customer or an angered boss to do some damage control. Seeing shades of blue on you can make him/her feel less stressed and lower inclination to aggression. This (fingers crossed!) should make appeasing him/her much easier.
3. Black: The shade of authority
   Black is a somber color that oozes responsibility, power and authority. That’s probably the differentiating factor that makes Batman’s getup look less hilarious than Superman’s.
   Wear it when: You are chairing an important meeting. To ensure that every attendee—even those more senior than you are—take you seriously, wearing black can make them feel that you mean business. You could also include black in your work getup if you want your boss to start noticing you as a potential candidate to promote to a managerial position.
4. Orange: The energetic hue
   Just like red, orange is an attention-grabbing color, but is more soothing on the eyes. Orange helps channel energy and can put people instantly in a chirpy and positive mood.
   Wear it when: You need to encourage your team mates. During a particularly demoralizing period when everyone in the office is feeling moody from setbacks or crazy deadlines, include orange in your outfit when you address them so the optimistic spirit can rub off on them too. 
5. Purple: The tint of intuition
   Purple is often associated with luxury and sophistication. At the same time, this color is a stimulating shade that’s said to get you in tune with your spiritual and intuitive side.
   Wear it when: You need to make a tough decision and are going nowhere. Standing at a career crossroad? Or need to make a difficult judgment? Put on your thinking cap—preferably in purple—to help you reach a conclusion you’d be at peace with.(This Article is courtesy of Yahoo She philippines)

 

You Get What You Ask For!

In life we get what we ask for.

Now you surely say that it isn't true. You say you ask for freedom and happiness and all you got was feeling imprisoned and bad.

Let's have a closer look to how creation works and how our subconscious mind works. Because it's the same.

Everything that exists is created in someone's mind. Everything starts with a thought. A thought is an energy. Energy wants to manifest itself. A lot of thoughts in the same direction will, that's for sure, manifest in the real world.

This is the process of creation. 
We are created by the same process. We use this process of creation all the time, 
without knowing it.

When we are not conscious, then we are like most people and use this power to create a negative life. We have negative thoughts and get negative results.
Once we learn how to think positive thoughts, we will get positive results in our life.

How come? Our subconscious mind is like the earth. It does not interfere with what we sow. Earth does not say :"Nja I have enough of these carottes, it's every time the same thing, I will make potatoes of it!" Earth does not say : "Bah I don't like red flowers, I will turn the red into blue for these roses!" Earth does not interfere. Earth is patient, works in silence and gives us exactly what we put in it. And we KNOW that! We know we will get exactly what we put in the earth. When we put yellow flowers in it, we don't expect them to be red when they blossom. When we sow roses in the garden we don't expect onions to come out in spring!

And yet that's how we react in real life. We sow onions and expect roses. We sow negative thoughts in our mind (onions) and expect good things (roses) to come out! We fool ourselves! And we blame others. We look for who can possibly be the fault of that (usually we blame the parents or the husband/wife for what goes wrong in our life). And then we cry and say we don't have any luck in our lives. We look at the neighbour and think he's lucky because he has roses in his garden, and we wonder what we did to the world to deserve only onions in our garden!<When the mainstream of your thoughts is negative, let's say for 85 %, than the outcome will be negative for 85%. Your thoughts fall into your subconscious mind, which executes exactly what you put in it. It is like the earth. It is like a computer. When you type in your computer : "I am stupid, I am fat, I am ugly, nobody loves me", are you angry with your printer when the paper comes out that says "I am stupid, I am fat, I am ugly, nobody loves me"? Do you throw a shoe at your computer and do you yell at him that he is the fault of everything that's going wrong? No, because you know you put that information in it and your computer does not interfere. The output matches exactly the input.

So works our subconscious mind. If you don't like the output, change the input. You get exactly what you ask for = what you think of the whole day. Don't be angry with your life. You are not angry with the onions, are you? You are not angry with your computer, are you? Instead of being angry, learn how it works and learn to get positive results in your life. Start thinking positive thoughts. Think only thoughts you wish to see happen in real life. Think only what you want to become true. And wait for a while, be patient. One day you will harvest what you sew, like you know earth will give you back what you put in it. It is never lost. Just wait and see. ( Courtesy of Readbud.com)

Law of Attraction - An Ancient Money Getting Secret

There is a secret to getting the law of attraction to move mountains and to create miracles beyond belief. As you may already know applying the law of attraction with success can be a hit of miss for many people. While there are people who claim to have outstanding results there are those who also complain of not getting what they want. That is because not many people really know the full missing part to applying the law of attraction.


Let me first tell you how powerful this secret is beyond the law of attraction. Think about how long you have been trying to attract some of the things you want. Maybe you have been applying all of the tools that you know of. You have been visualizing your goals. You have been repeating affirmations and perhaps even taking wild actions towards attracting more money but still nothing has changed.

Can you really get the law of attraction to manifest what you want faster? Chances are your answer will be a resounding, no. There is a good reason for that, it is a secret that few people will ever know and it is a secret so powerful that if you gave it a try you would be astounded by your results.

Many years ago when the true secrets to manifesting were not quite so public practitioners became aware of powerful forces in the universe. These forces were immensely powerful and allowed those who called on those forces to create incredible results again and again.

How powerful are those forces you ask and what can they do? - Manifest what you want with out struggling

- Calm your negative emotions so that you are more in harmony with the universe

- Attract more of everything that you want without doing extra work

- Clear away mental, physical and psychic block that are holding you back

- Change your whole life faster than ever

- Do in less time what would take others years

- Feel more joyful without trying to

These are all the things you can experience when you connect to the universal forces in the universe. You can begin to make the law of attraction work magically for you when you do align yourself to those secret forces. Put away all that you think you know or understand about the law of attraction and begin to see miracles and magic happen in your life.


One of the first steps to applying this outrageous secret... is to outrageous still and to allow yourself to entire the void. It is the first step there is o need to visualize, no need to repeat anything just be in the void. This is a powerful first step than cannot be underestimated.

Getting Rich Quickly!

How often do we receive this message each day in our email or blasted to us over the airwaves? Too many to count and so much so that we become numb to the message.

Here is exactly how to get rich quick. Count your blessings. What? You have no blessings? Oops! Think again! Everyone can find some blessings if they but look more closely.

Love:
The love of your family and friends and your love of humanity. Perhaps you find 'love' a strange word to use so you do not call it 'love' per se; perhaps you call it a deep sense of wishing the very best for those closest to you; and an abiding positive wish for all the best of life for them. This feeling, that many call 'love' is the fountain from which all other blessings flow.

Your job, vocation or profession:
Even though there may be days you dread the clamor of the alarm clock, and you drag yourself out of bed to face another day of problems to solve and people that try your patience it is after all a blessing.

Many people do not have even a job, much less a vocation or profession. Look beyond the rude people and problems and see them as an opportunity to make a difference in some way. You may not change those rude people into mild mannered, genteel people but you can change you and how you react to them. This is your opportunity to practice patience and tolerance and perhaps these people will recognize this seed and plant it within themselves.

"Day by day in every way I am getting better and better." This quote was made famous by the French hypnotist Emile Coue'. This is a wonderful quote to keep in mind when you find yourself slipping into a morass of negative thinking. Our minds are more powerful than we give them credit for being. It is truly amazing that our subconscious mind will grab on to just one negative thought and refuse to let it go, whereas it may take several times (or several hundred) positive thoughts to reprogram that thought, but it will happen with perseverance.

Mind Power: The Ultimate Success Formula

What does it take to be successful?

Ask around and you will find different answers to the formula of success. The truth is, success leaves clues and you can achieve the success in the area you desire by observing the common qualities and principles. They are simple and considered to be common sense but most people simply do not follow them.

Let me share with you one of my favorite quotes:

"There are no secrets to success. It is the results of preparation, hard work, and learning from failure" Colin Powell

As stated in that quote, there are three key factors to achieve massive success in your life:

1.Preparation

You don't have to wait for everything to be perfect. Start with the first step and keep moving. Success doesn't happen over night. Prepare, prepare, and prepare. You must be ready to receive the success you desire. Set your sight to the destination that you want to achieve, then work and prepare for the moment when the opportunity knocks your door.

2.Hard Work

Success needs hard work. Don't listen to these 'get rich quick' schemes. You need to build your character and work hard on yourself and your business to achieve greatness. Work hard and work smart. Do the right things and do them in the right way. Don't procrastinate. Take bold actions. Work long hours and craft your legacy.

3.Learning from failure
Successful people do not see failures as failures. They see them as important learning lessons. Lessons that are capable of giving them insights to prevent such mistakes from happening again. By adopting this mindset of turning each failure into a learning lesson or opportunity, you can never fail until you yourself quit.

Finding The Hidden Self

People today are starting to recognize the value of self-talk. At one time people thought of those that talked to self as someone with a mental ailment. This is not true today. Experts are recognizing that self-talk is a healthy tool that we all can use to find answers to our questions and resolve many problems.

At one time, people thought outer appearance made the person. However, today, people are starting to realize that beauty is skin deep, while inner beauty is to the bone. Today people are running to find ways to develop self.

Recently, personality development courses opened to help these people find their way. Now, people are not spending countless of dollars on improving their looks, rather they are spending more time and money to find ways of healing the hidden self.

The hidden being is decided on the inner conscious. We all have several hidden personalities that we do not recognize. These personalities often come out, usually when feelings are expressed.

To understand one's feelings, one has to use his or her self-talk tools. Most of us can manage our job tasks on a daily schedule, but when it comes to managing our feelings and emotions, often it becomes a struggle. Using self-talk tools can change this behavior. As humans, we often struggle to abandon bad behaviors, or habits. The common problem we face today is greed. We see this by examining human behaviors. You probably noticed that on several occasions when a person made a small lump sum of cash, they often want more. Instead of accepting that they have what they need, many people will thrive to make more money, and often find themselves down and out at the end; Life seems to be nothing more than the almighty dollar, i.e. most people's goal in life.

People tend to believe that they can attain happiness and love by making more money. The fact is these people often find themselves stressing, because they failed to realize that finding love, joy, and peace is the true road to self-development. Success or failure is not what makes a person. What makes a person is fighting through the hidden messages in the subliminal mind to discover self. < We all battle emotional responses, such as anger, sadness, joy, et cetera and these emotions ignite from failures, depression, and success and so on. We all feel down at times. There is no way that we can escape the feeling of sadness, joy, anger, et cetera, but there is a way we can all take control of what we express and feel.

Another problem we face is dependency. Many people in the world today depend on others to pick them up when they are down. This leads to major problems, simply because not one person has the power to heal you, but you.



To work through all of these problems, we must depend on self, and develop a winning attitude to build confidence. By changing our approach, we can see that the world is our own based on how we accept it. If a body is unhappy, then the world will seem like a miserable place to live. One of the common sayings today is, "Life is a B, and then you die." This entire negative is causing them to miss the benefits of living.

In each of our lives, some of us are fortunate while others are unfortunate. We must realize that everything we endure takes place to help us learn. For instance, a severely traumatized person may have lived a life of overwhelming violence. There is a point to be made here. Of course, this person is the victim and has no responsibility of what has occurred in his or her life, yet the point is made clear at the end of this person's journey.

Search For Self

Another Article I just wanna share and must be re-posted.

The human self is a temple of the Divine.

Life goes on. You can choose to let life flow or get stuck and just keep spinning your wheels. Each day offers a chance to look at the brighter side of life and enjoy it. Each day is a chance to be connected with your divinity. Each day heralds a new beginning. You have to be part of it.

The world never stands still. Time comes when battles that were once critical no longer top the list of priorities. That is if you learn to reconcile yourself with the past, sort out the precious lessons and move on.

Take control of your life, validate yourself, honor and respect your being and most of all, love yourself. This is not about being aggressive, domineering and always in control and confrontational. It is not about becoming self-absorbed.

Far from it. It is about offering a more compatible YOU in a relationship. There are inevitable bumps in any relationship, unavoidable falls and pitfalls.No problem lasts forever. There has to be a way to adjust your sails and enjoy the breeze, not get lost in the storm.Take stock of your life. What are your illusions?What is your reality? How do you deal with failure, with disappointments and the other elements thatfuel stress? Are you just coping, mostly in a crisis management mode? What can you do?

Sometimes, one's world, one's hopes and dreams come crashing with a big bang, a major shaking up of life. This is a chance to take a great leap of faith, to grow and strengthen your self-trust that is eroding. Move on without fear. Fear can be paralyzing. Move on instead with self-confidence. Have faith in yourself. Faith is enduring. Grab the chance to harness the power from the river of knowledge already flowing through your being, to take that first step to get up and move on to the next phase. Time to let go and really let go. Hanging on to personal loss builds up powerful negative blocks; these fuel anger, grief, bitterness, vindictiveness, distrust, confrontation, erodes self-confidence- all negative but very powerful energies. Over time, accumulation of these take its toll on your health.

Why allow a negative influence to knock on the door? Hurtful issues tend to get remote and forgotten.over time.Why dwell on these, the negative energy gets very powerful and takes on a life of its own. What purpose does it serve? NOTHING.